So during my most recent trip to beloved Wal-Mart (See: The Retail Embrace) I swiped (swiped as in made a quick purchase decision — NOT as in stole…puh-leez, the whole thrill of Wal-Mart shopping is PAYING so little for items that NYC grocery/drug store/bodegas charge you an arm and a leg for) copy of The Biggest Loser: Last Chance Workout DVD. My intention was a pretty low-investment one — when it’s too cold to go running and I’m not near a treadmill/elliptical, this would be the fourth-tier option.  The sloppy seconds of working out.

Well, just because seriously overweight people can do it while exercising does NOT make it easy. Lesson learned. I did the entire DVD and was f*cking schooled. Ten points Jillian Michaels. Her combo of cardio (aka eternal mountain climbers on the ground) and strength training (the one-handed push ups make me want to curl in a ball) with no breaks can make a grown woman cry.

That said, once I finished — I wanted more. I ventured to try Jillian Michaels’ 6 Week Six-Pack. Holy sh*t. EVEN HARDER than the first DVD. The best part about all her DVD is that she admits how killer it is — Jillian does not even TRY to hide the fact that her workout hurts your SOUL. I’m pretty sure a verbatim quote is “You feel like you’re gonna die. You’re not. I’ll tell you what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna look RIDICULOUS. That’s what you’re gonna do.”

Yeah, that’s right. Hiding from pain was so five minutes ago. Oh, and hello abs. Nice to meet you! Thanks, Jillian.

UPDATE: After doing Warrior Fitness and TRX classes in NYC, I now know a whole new meaning of exhaustion. Jillian was an hors d’oeuvre.